Artemis Parvati

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Introducing my new sole proprietorship: Artemis Parvati. I am offering independent contracting services which can be done remotely from my home. For instance, I can write something for you, research a topic, provide unsurpassed customer service, patiently teach an older person how to use current technology, walk your dog, etc. I offer genuine empathy and an authentic desire to make a living out of the cubicle.

Please contact me for more information:

artemisparvati@outlook.com

https://artemisparvati.wixsite.com/services

Thank you for your support!

A Plea

Hello everyone. I just watched the mother of the Charlottesville, VA woman who was killed during the recent rally. She eulogized her daughter in the most eloquent possible way. Tears came shooting out of my eyes and my muscles began to involuntarily shake. I tried to imagine her pain and listen to her words simultaneously; the waves of emotion were almost too much to bear. Please seek out video of her if you haven’t already.

I have taken the step of blocking every mainstream media and political site on my Twitter account. I am finding it more difficult on Facebook, but I will not stop until I no longer see hatred on my social media. The overexposure is literally causing me physical pain and I fear strangers in a way I have never feared them before. I am begging all that read this to please, please stop posting stuff that fuels hatred. I am willing to read about and research whatever it is you believe in, but please give me legitimate sources. Help me get to the truth, along with you.

I want to see what is real. Examples would include: pictures of your family, things you have fun doing, things you learned about yourself and/or life, how you are doing, things like that. No one can refute, debate, or troll happiness or knowledge. I wanted to cancel all my social media accounts altogether, but for now I think the best move is to use them to encourage what is real and reject what is not. The more we fight each other, the more those in control do not have to atone for their sins.

Thank you for reading this post, and I wish you epiphanies. Oh, and the picture of Buzz was to lure you in. Dogs rule. Truth told.

With love,

Tiff

Video Killed The Radio Star

radiostar

The year was 1981 and I was 8 years old. The anticipation was almost palpable, for most everyone it seemed. MTV (Music Television) was going to change the world by bringing artists into our living rooms through music videos. Thing is, you had to have cable television service to get MTV and the available analog service at the time was expensive. It was impossible to convince my parents that cable television was a necessity, for we had survived thus far without it. As August 1 approached, I new I was going to be out of the playground social group for good; everyone else was going to see MTV launch and I would only hear about its epic awesomeness.

As the winter holiday season of 1981 approached, a miracle occurred! I was invited to my friend’s house for a slumber party, and her parents just got cable TV. Oh, how the angels sang! And I witnessed my first music video in all its splendor. It was Michael Jackson’s Thriller, and I sat wide-eyed and open-mouthed as pure entertainment danced out of the TV screen. I was hooked, and so were all of my friends by the time all of us were in the vicinity of a TV with cable programming. By Christmas, my parents decided that having cable was a great idea because of HBO (Home Box Office). It was a win-win.

Up until then, I had only my imagination to go along with music I heard from the radio. I made up my own images, stories, and meanings based upon how the songs made me feel – and decided what I thought some of the songs’ lyrics were because there was no way to look them up anywhere. My relationship with music, and more specifically words, felt special… my own. However, I bought into the reasoning that seeing the actual artists perform their music with their own interpretations coming through the TV screen would be better than what I was capable of imagining. It was going to be like going to a concert in a way, and along with my Atari gaming console, life was good.

I have always had a relationship with the TV and still do. MTV was different though – it appealed to me like nothing else had, including movies and cartoons. It seemed so relevant compared to the rest of the options available to me. I continued to play outside with my friends, in part because I wanted to and in part because my  parents limited my time with technology. I had a balanced mix of people time and fantasy time, with many responsibilities thrown in. Being a kid, I allowed myself to believe what I saw and heard coming from the TV. Somehow the boundary between what I truly felt in my heart and what I was “supposed to be” disappeared. I do not blame TV or MTV at all; to the contrary. I am trying to understand who I once was before it all began in order to understand who I am supposed to be now. I gave up myself, and knowing why and what I’m going to do about it is my current intent.

MTV introduced reality TV in unprecedented ways, keeping with their fresh-trendy style. I was able to see people behave in ways that I only thought occurred behind closed doors. The drama, topics of conversation, worldly locales, and highly attractive players brought us into another world, wanting us to care about what would happen next. People did care. Millions of them did, and reality TV is brasher and more popular than ever. I gave the characters on reality TV my empathy, and that seems to have been a very serious mistake. Another mistake was brushing off the way I saw them interact with each other. I assumed that once the cameras were off, they would make up and they were all really friends. The drama was a little inflated, but that’s show biz. The shallowness, deceit, and blind sides bothered me each time but I kept watching.

I feel as if the outside world has become a reality show, and I want to get voted off of the island. Seriously. Vote me off, exile me to somewhere else, just let me out of this charade. I don’t want to blind side another to achieve this, nor do I want to use trickery nor any tactics that seem shady. I just don’t belong and it’s better for everyone. It took me over forty years to realize that I became a disposable person in other’s eyes. Not everyone, just most everyone that isn’t in my circle. The reality TV stars dispose of each other all the time, and many shows are completely based upon documenting the removal of people in a malicious and embarrassing manner. I have tried to understand how others can exchange personal vulnerabilities, and sometimes intimacies, and then turn around and treat each other like garbage. No loyalty. No respect. No remorse. No self introspect. Everything disposed of nice and tidy and on to the next one. I am not capable of this and certainly am not looking to be. Thankfully things have not gotten to the point that drivers think they can just run over whoever they want. That’s still a crime, although people will do with their cars what they won’t do to you in person.

What is your purpose here? Is it to regurgitate someone’s else’s opinion or one that you heard from the TV? Is the programming with the most updated graphics and mainstream endorsement the only source of your information? Have you researched anything on your own? Are you actually free? These are the kinds of questions I am asking myself nowadays. I also need to find that girl I was before MTV and ask her what mattered, for she may be the only one that remembers. Before society told me that I had to be a certain way, I was happy making up my own definitions. And my heart has always known what is right, although my mouth and actions said otherwise. The most challenging work is unlearning what I knew without the need to replace the void right away. I think this means more walks with Buzz…

 

 

RUH ROH

Scooby Doo was right: monsters are just people in disguise. I wish I had Scooby’s sniffing-out-the-bad-guys skills, especially back when I was more interested in the prize in my cereal box and watching cartoon capers. I had to learn the hard way, through disappointment, betrayal, anger, and conflict. Now it seems every stranger is a monster in a mask, waiting to see if I’ll act in the manner they find most suitable. Many strangers control my life as a matter of fact; I am learning more and more each day about just how deep the monster rabbit hole goes…

 

Truth is, I don’t know the truth. Not THE TRUTH. But I do know that vital information has been purposely kept from me, twisted into propaganda to control me, and along with millions of others I am not actually free. The more I dig the more I see; elitist groups pulling the puppet strings, banks and corporations determining human values, manufactured vitriol spilling into the streets, and people turning into sheep-zombies perpetuating the lies. Everything I thought I knew is in question, and the more I research the more I unlearn. Sure, it’s frightening to go about my day and make decisions knowing that I ultimately don’t know a damn thing. However, I’d rather not know then take action based upon someone else’s agenda disguised as my own.

 

How can I reconcile a need to authentically connect with others with an understanding that I am a disposable person to most of the general public and elites? Must I continually offer up some sort of empathy to those I encounter, knowing that it may be perceived as weakness and gullibility? When does compassion lead to becoming a fool? My expectations have become nearly impossible to meet, it seems. I expect empathy when empathy is given; I expect respect when respect is given; I expect acceptance when acceptance is given – you get the idea. It is noble to give just to experience the act of giving; however, how does one know when it’s time to quit being used? What if others expect me to give at a level that they are not? These questions compound my pursuit of happiness and truth and all I know at this point is that I have to keep being kind, even when it seems impossible. Simultaneously I believe that we are all connected and that most of us are blind sheep. Perhaps being kind will alter the social ether somehow, revealing monsters for who they really are before it’s too late for the Mystery Machine to save us.

 

Is is hot in here, or is it just me?

sun

Summer is broken. Something happened, and for the first time in my life I experienced 1% humidity. The southwestern heat is different this year, and I have over a decade in Phoenix as testimony to what nature can dish out. This is my third July in Las Vegas, and natural light itself is not normal. My skin immediately burns when I go outside, as if I turned up the UV volume to maximum. I once forgot to put my sunglasses on before leaving the house, and in the second it took me to put them on, I fried my eyes so badly that I saw pink spots for about 10 minutes afterwards. The “bite” is harsher somehow, and there are a multitude of online videos showing unprecedented objects actually melting, including a cactus! When a cactus melts, that’s bad, right?

There are many explanations as to why this is happening and I am not aligning myself with any of them enough to declare an actual “belief” at this point. What I have observed, however, is how it has changed people. My partner works outside and I have never seen him become human jerky until this summer. He is so drained and exhausted after a 8-10 hour day that after a shower and dinner, there isn’t much left for himself or anyone else in the family. I know he wants to be present, but the heat is simply too much day in and day out. I can’t even make it few minutes outside without whining and profusely sweating, and he’s out in it all day… and do you think the general public cares? Hell no. Sometimes I forget to walk a mile in his shoes as well; I’d probably die just carrying his tool belt.

People are getting ultra angry over the littlest of things because it is so hot. The light is frying our brains and I hide a lot lately, avoiding going places during busy times and only if I have to. I’ve gone into hermit crab mode, peering out from my air conditioned shell only when absolutely necessary. When I take Buzz on our early morning walks (before it starts looking like the movie Pitch Black outside), I think to myself, “this place shouldn’t be here.” I see all the casinos, all the hotels, all the people… I hear all the air conditioners, all the cars, all the noise… and know that without Hoover Dam and Lake Mead, this place couldn’t exist as it does now. This summer has tasked the man-made, and it is painfully obvious how expensive it is to keep up a fake oasis in the desert.

The forecast for this week calls for temperatures possibly under 100 degrees, but at least under 110. Thank God. Maybe a monsoon storm will finally show off and give Las Vegas a ride… maybe people will literally cool off and quit being jerks… maybe Lady Luck was never here in the first place. I only know one thing for sure… by this time next year, I want to be on my way to moving further north and looking at trees. I miss trees. And not burning when I go outside. Lava love to my Phoenix friends and family – it’s a dry heat, like a kiln. There’s no Vin Diesel either.

 

Facebook Post – June 29, 2017

On this last day of my 43rd year of life, I wanted to share some reflections with you. I thought by this age I would know a lot more about the things I don’t and a lot less about the things I do. I have been through the human condition trifecta of experiences that cripple many of the general population: bankruptcy, divorce, and a close family member with cancer. I also battled, and when I say battled I mean it, alcoholism. My scars, grey hairs, and wrinkles all attest to my hardened seasoning. Now all I want to do is be kind. This is the most difficult challenge I have encountered to date because of the current social environment. Highly sensitive people like me are not regarded as strong; in fact, many of us have been used up already, our emotional talents taken for granted and behaviors condemned. Taking the time to actually listen to another person before concocting a response is an artform and I excel at it. I have the empathetic skills necessary to imagine what it could feel like to be another person because I have been through so much myself. I can back up my authenticity and if allowed, and make a real connection with another. I respect vulnerability because I know the pain caused when it isn’t valued. I want to give because my personal results have shown that it attracts positive energy in my life. The more I give, the more I love myself and when I love myself, it is much easier to calm the emotional seas. Also, if I don’t take care of myself, I cannot take care of anyone else. There is something coming, I firmly believe this. I know it sounds like one of those doomsdayer folks standing on the city street corner with a homemade prophetic sign, but I had to dig down to depths never seen before to become a happier person. I have found a purpose and it is to be kind in a world that continues to become meaner. People pile on each other’s flaws, attack each other’s politics, use protest signs as weapons, all the while walking past the mirror on their way out the door. The pendulum is going to swing back and swing back hard. We know this isn’t the right way, don’t we? We are all hurting because something just isn’t right. I haven’t quite figured out how to be classy, forthright, compassionate, and forgiving all at once, but this is my new goal for the 44th year of my life. I believe being kind is going to save us all. Kindness brought my chosen family back together, so on paper I am divorced but in reality I’m committed to my husband. We worked it out from the foundation up, thanks to sobriety. We stopped the vitriol, quit spewing venom, and rewrote our own book on communication. Our kids rock and will continue to rock guaranteed. As parents we fully understand the value of building strong children instead of broken men and we have made so many mistakes along the way. I would rather have 4 quarters than 100 pennies these days, treasuring what truly matters: Love, understanding, and acceptance. Many people have faded in and out of my life and I thank you all for the lessons I learned. Some of them really sucked, though. For my birthday wish, I would like to ask you all just to enjoy something beautiful. Really enjoy it. Then go from there…